Knowledge and Wisdom

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

 

 

 

This is hard for me.. because I know when I'm eating something I shouldn't.. I know when something isn't good for you, or when something is... but its hard for me to wrap my mind around a complete change.

 

I hate having to let go of so many good things... I'm a very picky eater to a point. I've been trying, but I can't say I've been trying my HARDEST. Which is upsetting to myself, because I know I could do much better then I have been.

 

Part of my mindset, is I know vacation is going to be a little rough to keep track on. I know we wont be eating out the whole time, or eating junk, but at the end of the day, its very hard to eat 100% healthy. So I've been thinking "I'll just do whatever til I get back, and then I'll buckle down." NO! I cannot think like that.. that's horrible.

 

I know I have so much more potential then I lead on.

 

I have to start the "job hunt" again after I get home from Florida... I need to find a position in a company that I'll be planning on staying with for a long while, and helps me be more stable. Right now I make enough to get by.. Pay the bills, and be done. I need to do more then just get buy. I cannot make a life with where I'm at right now.

 

I don't want to sound as though I blame my unhealthiness or my eating habits on the every day stresses of life, because I don't. but it sure is hard to be happy in life, when not all of your angles connect in the right place.

 

It will happen for me, I know it will. Soon everything will click into place. I'll find somewhere that makes me happy. Where I know when I put in all this energy into a job, its actually being recognized for what it is. Where I wont be as stressed, and things will come easy. (hopefully!)

 

I'm so excited for this vacation. Florida for a week. Boyfriend for a week. No work, for a week! I haven't spent much time with Corey lately because our schedules are just so off, but I'm so glad I get to have this much needed time with him! (and his family, of course!) :) Disney World is going to be a blast!!!

 

I'll update more when I get back from our trip. I'll let you know how the eating went. and how things are going to whip into shape when I get back. That includes maybe getting a gym membership or figuring out a schedule to go out and get some exercise.

 

Have a GREAT week!! :)

One Day...

THIS. IS. NOT. EASY...

I think the most frustrating part, is when I don't work... Lets be clear here- I LOVE my days off.. don't get me wrong. But I feel like when I'm in a rush, its easier to grab and go.. get everything set before hand. However if I'm home all day- or out the entire day, its hard for me to be good.

Yesterday my dad and I worked at the Kent Farmers Market from 8-2 and while there, I didn't eat. I did have a snocone- which isn't really good for you. But neither is going for 6 hours without eating. It was so hot out though, that even though I brought apples and nuts for a snack, I didn't feel like eating. We had BBQ for dinner, in which I tried to be good, but I was hungry.

I know it takes work, and I know its not easy. And luckily enough we don't have a WHOLE lot of junk in our house that's tempting.. and I've been really good about not eating out. Friday night we had a really late dinner, and we wanted something simple. My dad said just grab a burger and bring it home.. so I suggested taco bell so it would at least be a little better then burgers and fries... Not to say any fast food is good- but I tried to compare my options...

I have drank so much water in the last few days, I'm quite amazed with myself! Yesterday I had almost 2 liters before noon...

I try and drink a glass when I get up in the morning.. a bottle on my way to work.. and then I put a bottle in my lunch and refill it before going back to work... I've been doing really well- its just hard to force yourself to drink it. I LOVE water, I really do.. but I feel like I have to remember to drink it. With pop, I just drink it all the time, and am always thirsty... with water I'm not thirsty- so I forget to have it.

I'm worried about vacation at the end of the month!! We're going to Florida! That's going to be a hard one, to be good the whole time!!! But I'm going to try my hardest!! Its going to be hot, so water is definitely a must!! But I know I can make it work. Sucky thing is, I don't want to buy clothes, but I don't even own a pair of shorts... All my sundresses make me look pregnant, which is why I don't wear them in public.. and I don't want to wear pants the whole trip.

I don't even wish to be 110lbs.. I just want to be smaller, and healthier. Its so hard sometimes to see people do whatever they want, whenever they want, and I cant. I cant wear whatever I want, because I couldn't imagine people talking bad about what I look like. Which- I'm sure people do anyways, but I don't need to give them more reason. I'm not trying to impress people, but its just amazing when you think about all the things you are held back from.


One day, it'll be me.... one day.